You Are So Nashville If…

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You are so Nashville if... you get your husband a goldfish for his birthday and name it 'Gritty' (short for 'Integrity') just so he could make his grand exit by leaving work one day shouting (with fishbowl in hand): 'I'm leaving and I'm taking my Integrity with me!' -- as seen in the Jerry McGuire movie. These are some of our favorites that have appeared in The Scene’s annual listing.

You Are So Nashville If…

  • You helped make “Dixie Chicked” a verb. –Joe Scutella
  • You started a prayer circle at church that the Titans keep Eddie George. –Jennifer Castleman
  • You’ve driven down Music Row listening to a CD full of illegally downloaded songs. –Zack Bennett
  • You know where all the country music stars live. –Unknown
  • Your church congregation is referred to as “the studio audience.” –Sharon Kasserman
  • You look at karaoke as more of an audition than a fun night out. –Unknown
  • The mariachi band at your favorite Mexican restaurant knows “Rocky Top.” –William C. Carter
  • You slip your demo tape into the bags of trick-or-treaters. –Rowland Stebbins
  • You have a picture of yourself touching the butt of one of the “Musica” dancers on Music Row. –Matt Land
  • Your town’s biggest attraction is a memorial service. –Unknown
  • You took a demo tape to Johnny Cash’s funeral. –Unknown

UPDATE: The 2005 Edition

  • Instead of reading the cereal box while eating breakfast, you read CD booklets to see who wrote the songs and who the session musicians are. –Unknown
  • You intentionally drive drunk in hopes of promoting your new album. –Dana Delworth
  • You drive to a park (Percy Warner) to walk on a street (Belle Meade Boulevard). –Jim Day
  • You grab your guitar (with dollar signs in your eyes) and write a song after each national tragedy. –Dan Watterson
  • You live at Arbors of Brentwood, The Preserve at Brentwood, Archstone Brentwood or Brentwood Downs and think you actually live in Brentwood. –Unknown
  • You eat in East Nashville, you shop in East Nashville, you hang out in East Nashville, but…you would never live in East Nashville. –Kathi Johnson
  • You go to a Church of Christ, but have to explain, “not THAT kind of Church of Christ.” –Phil Wilson
  • You take your 8-year-old to see four hours of torture in “The Passion of the Christ”, but you’re horrified he saw an exposed breast during the Super Bowl. –Philip Marlowe
  • You’re 30+ and you’re still an intern on Music Row. –Unknown
  • You consider yourself more “Passion of the Christ” than “Fahrenheit 9/11”. –Michael Dorr
  • You think the sun has set, but it is actually just on the other side of a Brentwood church. –Lucas Leverett
  • You and your wife are both 44 years old. You take her to a famous downtown bar. You are the youngest man there, and she is the oldest woman. –Louis Katzerman
  • You laugh at tourists traveling up Music Row who think the buildings are owned by record companies, and not Vanderbilt University. –Unknown
  • You tried to go to Bonnaroo, but ended up at Fan Fair because of the traffic. –Kate Graves
  • You can’t check out a library book on Fridays. –Clifton Kaiser
  • You still think your church’s worship leader is straight. –Scott Winchell
  • Only after Bart Durham left your family picnic did it dawn on you that he’s not family. –Stacy Harris
  • You go to Faith Night at the Nashville Sounds because the beer line is short. –Steve Bass
  • You bought Dave Ramsey’s book with a credit card. –Zack Bennett
  • You play in four bands made up of different combinations of the same six people. –Matt Michiels
  • The table you are waiting on asks if they can pray for you. –David Friedlander
  • You’re not that kind of Christian. –Drew Maynard
  • You feel animosity toward anybody driving a car with a “Williamson” sticker on it. –Zack Bennett
  • You wonder if you were the one who gave Chely Wright the finger on West End Avenue. –Ilissa Gold
  • Your property appraisal got a bigger raise this year than you did. –Jeff Porter
  • You spend more on car flags than you give to charity. –Mike O’Brien
  • Your weatherman spends 45 minutes of prime airtime describing a five-minute storm. –Karen Hitt
  • The NashTrash tour has ever stopped at the end of your driveway. –Zack Bennett
  • You can’t tell which one is “Big” and which one is “Rich,” but you’re damn sure there ain’t no top hats in country music. –Clifton Kaiser
  • Your new guilty pleasure is circling the new Hustler Hollywood in your car because the Musica statue just isn’t doing it for you anymore. –Chad Johnson
  • You’ve ever said or thought, “Next time I go to the Loveless, I am just getting the biscuits.” –Brad Weiner
  • You know exactly which movie theater someone is referring to if they say 8, 12, 16, 20 or 27. –Karen Daniel
  • You recognize everyone at the bar from their profile. –Daniel Bell
  • Your wife blushes when Cowboy Troy says “posse.” –Thom Abell
  • You boast of your Southern culture when speaking about food or literature, but hide it when politics is in the air. –Kate L. Graves

UPDATE: The 2006 Edition

  • You were a gay cowboy before being a gay cowboy was cool. –Mike Williams
  • You’d rather keep your quarterback and trade your senator. –Renee Kasman
  • Youre Bob Corker and you’ve approved this message. –Wando Weaver
  • Your marathon was slower this year because you circled Musica 10 times. –Pat Johnson
  • You’re the only one who hasn’t run into Nicole Kidman (Kecole) in Green Hills. –Ilissa Gold
  • You ask to be put on the guest list at a benefit concert. –Heather Day
  • The bailing wire holding your bumper to your car is a low E string. –Dave Weil
  • Your district has more poll workers than voters. –Pat Johnson
  • You buy sushi from Publix. –Victoria Pittman
  • You’re just now loving Johnny Cash music. –Victoria Pittman
  • Your carwash talks to you in Spanish. –Steve Dobbrastine
  • You stop at Frugal’s on the way home from Bible study. –Bruce Carlock
  • You think that Cowboy Troy is a retired quarterback. –Harold Homberger
  • You bought and sold a downtown condo before they even broke ground. –Todd Shelton
  • Your McNair jersey is already on eBay. –Michele Trotty
  • You oppose gay marriage because it undermines the institution but wish Travis a
    nd Sarah had tied the knot. –Matt Burnstein
  • Your church has a larger profit margin than Exxon. –Brooke Carey
  • Your high school sweetheart gives you extra credit. –Drew Maynard
  • Your (unsuccessful) suicide note was the best song you’ve written in years. –Mike Williams
  • You think blogging is a job. –Sam Davidson
  • Your real estate agent is also your favorite country singer. –John Danley
  • You work for Dave Ramsey and you have an adjustable rate mortgage. –Nancy Oakes
  • You know that historic and distinctive meet somewhere in East Nashville. –Wando Weaver
  • You now get your Sunday Tennessean at Wal-Mart to save a quarter. –Michele Totty
  • You think two Wal-Mart Supercenters are exactly what Nolensville Road needs. –Lola and Suzanne Austin
  • Al Gore is your friend on MySpace. –John Danley
  • You don’t realize you’re the punch line. –Paul Whitfield
  • You bust Ms. Cheap for buying nice shoes in a department store. –Sarah Hasenmueller
  • You don’t have any friends, but 1,000 people read your blog daily. –Chris Chamberlain
  • You can honky-tonk, but not so much the badonkadonk. –Tom Sager
  • You posed as a hurricane evacuee to get a hotel room for the UT/LSU football game. –Mike Williams


We moved from Florida to Tennessee in 2001. All signs point to the fact that we will probably retire here -- by choice. We L O V E Nashville! Our favorite places to live are just south of the City -- we've had houses in Brentwood, Franklin, and Spring Hill. And we have properties in Leipers Fork, Cookeville, and Lewisburg. This site is where I share my best tips for moving your family to Nashville and/or visiting Nashville for the first time -- with the ultimate goal of helping you find fun things to do in Williamson County and Davidson County. When I'm not out & about enjoying the Nashville area, you'll find me at the corner of Good News & Fun Times as publisher of The Fun Times Guide (32 fun & helpful websites). To date, I’ve written over 500 articles on this site! Many of them have upwards of 100K shares.

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